Thur. Oct. 22nd

Thursday, for Sergiy, was spent running again (like always) on our behalf collecting official documents for the adoption. He was hoping paperwork necessary for the Mayor's signature would be ready so he could take it to their office and keep the whole process moving as quickly as possible. Sergiy is a very motivated man and a "multi-tasker" - a man after my own heart!

News travels very quickly. When we were dropped off at the orphanage, Vala made it out the front door before we even walked up the steps. She greeted us with a smile and warm hugs. Her genuine happiness that we were there was apparent. I have seen no "acts" with this young gal - I believe what you see is what you get. If she is not happy about something, she generally keeps her mouth shut, but you see her mood in the expressions on her face. A poker face, she does not have. Still I have not seen her cross with other children, or even bossy. As one of the oldest children, she does instruct them and direct them from time to time, but never in a way that they seem to mind.

We spent part of the morning playing Uno. This is a wonderful way to pass the time and spend together. Many of the children come in and out of the game. They are all fun-loving children and love to giggle and laugh with their friends. It is a wonderful opportunity for us to teach, or rather remind them, to speak English. John and I were constantly saying "blue" or "nine" and the children would copy us. We also spent the game speaking English the entire time. Most of the children, even if they couldn't respond in English, knew pretty much what we were saying.

We were greatly encouraged. And they are so much fun to play with. Before the end of the game, we all knew each other's cards. It wasn't that they were "cheating" but that they were having too much fun. As they giggled and carried on, they would lean over and check out the person's cards next to them. They wanted to make sure the card they were to play wouldn't harm the child next to them when they played (i.e. put down a reverse and the child wouldn't be able to play a card). To them, it didn't matter who won or lost, it was just being together. It was very refreshing. This is a family.

Sergiy broke into the fun we had outside on the play yard later in the afternoon. He had good news - all the documents had been received, we are to dash to the train station to try and get tickets to Kiev tonight. We told the children goodbye and that we'd see them next week. It was hard to leave Vala behind.

With some finagling we were able to obtain a 2nd class sleeper car for John, Sergiy and myself. We packed much lighter, leaving behind our bags in a secure area. We are grateful we packed our suitcases before going to the orphanage in anticipation this might happen.

By the time we were dropped off at the apartment to finish getting our bags together, we were both starving. As usual, we had "worked" right through lunch. We seem to be only getting 2 meals a day. For those who know me, you'll understand how different the cuisine is when I was hunkering for a Big Mac, fries and a Coke (McDonalds is usually at the very last of my choices). We hustled down the square to the McDonalds and got lunch/dinner to go. We stuffed the food down and we thankful that Sergiy was 15 minutes later than he said. We knew there would be no dinner on the train and breakfast would not be until later the next morning.

We had a relaxed time chatting in our train car until the week finally caught up with us. We turned in early, hoping to get a head start on a restless night's sleep. Sergiy has traveled by train all his life and it doesn't seem to bother him. John and I found we woke up no less than 10 times on the way down. The trip back up to Kiev proved to be no different.

Until next time,

God bless - Jenn

Wed. Oct. 21st

I'm trying my best to keep things in small blogs (slightly unsuccessfully though! Yikes!) Spasiba (thank you) for your patience.

John reminded me of another moment while in the Director's office.....

Since there was no private moment for us, I was not sure what John was thinking about Vala from the moment we met her, but I had conflicting feelings over her rigid smile and pleading eyes. Although it melted my heart, I wasn't sure how to read what I was seeing. Was she nervous? or putting on an act of showing happiness? Was she told to behave a certain way to achieve being adopted? Something wasn't right and my lack of knowledge in her culture left me ignorant.

At one moment, I look down and saw her intricately painted nails - yellow with black flowers on the ends. Desperately looking for something to talk about, I reached down and picked up her fingers to comment on the beautiful paint job and ask if she did it herself. This poor girl's hands were sweaty and she was embarrassed for me to touch them and have her feelings revealed! She took me hook, line and sinker! She looked up at me with those dark brown eyes, tears in them. I smiled down at her, held her hand and squeezed it in understanding - she was not putting on an act - she was petrified we would not want her.

After spending 3 days with her, we can tell you, even through the language barrier, she is a sweet girl. She fully intends on becoming an American and is excited about having a family for the first time. She came to the orphanage when she was 5. She has been there 9 years, watching her friends be adopted or age-out and disappear from existence. Through various paperwork circumstances (and we believe God's grace to hold her for us to find each other), she was unadoptable until just two years ago. She loves to play, is a good athlete, and smart - she will fit in wonderfully with our children. Although problems will arise during the melding phase, I think her new brothers and sisters will be pleasantly surprised. And yes Sarah & Joella, she will definatly be the shortest - finally, huh?! She is a cute little package of smiles and personality.

Well, we can no longer stand the smoke filled atmosphere. I hope these posts today wet your appetites and help fill you in. We'll be signing off, but promise to be back. Lord willing, we'll be packing up again and heading back to Kiev on the overnight train. We'll try and get back on-line as soon as we can.

Much love to you all!
Thank you so much for the prayers.
Thank you also for the encouraging e-mails and comments - they help cheer us up.
Thank you Sally for the weather updates - it's fun and actually helps us plan what to wear - you know all about the fact that when we leave for the day, we have no idea when we'll be back home or how long it will be before we can eat again.

Until next time - Jenn

Wed. Oct. 21st

So we sat down, the Director behind her desk, the Inspector & Sergiy sitting in chairs to her right, and the three of us to her left in a row of chairs along one wall. Vala was closest to the Director's desk, with me next to her and John to my left.

The Director welcomed us in Russian and it was translated, but not word for word. The formal stuff was stated with the Inspector inputting questions to Vala also. We were asked, in that awkward meeting, if we accepted her as our adopted child and if she accepted us. We weren't expecting such a question immediately. Vala answered yes, she wants to be adopted by us. We came knowing that we intended on adopting her so even under those circumstances could answer yes without even looking at each other. John and I answered in verbal unison. The look on Vala's face showed she understood our answer and she was happy.

We pulled out photos we had planned on showing (thanks for the heads up Mark & Sally!). They poured over them, asking many questions and Sergiy translated our answers. During the photo time, Vala received a phone call on her friend's cell phone. She quickly smiled, said "sorry, excuse me" and ran out. This happened twice. We know now what was happening was the group of kids upstairs were all congregating around another cell phone and couldn't wait to hear about us!! She was obviously excited to tell all. : )

Every Ukrainian is dumbstruck when we tell them we have 5 children. Even then, the Inspector and Director really believed us when they saw the photos of our children with us. They can't understand why we would want to adopt 2 more children. We are told most Ukrainians only have 2-3 children. Life is too big of a struggle here and the housing is all very small, it's hard to care for more to them at a time. We are blessed to have the time, space and love in our hearts to expand our family.

As the attributes were told of Vala, it was mentioned that she loved to dance. This orphanage prides itself in teaching their children to dance. They are very talented! A special performance was put on for us. It was delightful! They dressed in costumes, greatly decorated, although revealing. (Shannon? PL conference?)

The entire society, as I'm sure it is throughout Europe, is very provocative. To a decree, it's embarrassing for us. It seems like there is very little to relieve your eyes, except the ground. Even in store windows, there are maniquens dressed in scanty outfits and underware. Women's modest clothing is still short skirts and low cut blouses and 3" heels (either in high heeled shoes or boots!). It's their way of doing things. We are thankful for this insight into their culture - it will help greatly in adapting our new daughters to things in our culture.

Wed. Oct. 21st

Hello to all our friends and family!
Like I said, because the internet connection is wishy-washy, I'm putting little Posts to the blog instead of one or two large ones. We hope you liked the photos of Don bass Area - it is a beautiful stadium.

So we know we are days behind in news and we're sorry for that. We've been dying to talk to you too.

Okay, we met at SDA last Thursday and received approval to see one girl - Valentina (Vala). On Friday afternoon they gave us the paperwork and we hopped on the overnight train with Sergiy and his family. Our apartment wasn't ready and we were homeless with 4 large suitcases and two carry on bags (awkward, huh?). We were left at the "pirate restaurant" where we ate and used the WIFI connection. The "orange, scary" apartment was ready in the late afternoon and we stayed there 2 days, then moved to our present apartment - a single studio room in the downtown area. It is very nice, cleaner, more secure and very close to everything.

One thing to mention, for those that don't know - most Ukrainians walk a considerable distance each day. Less than half of the households own a car, and that would only be one for the entire family, including adult children living with the family still. So the streets are packed with all types and ages of people walking to and from work, the market (which they buy daily from), school, etc. So all hours of the day and night, there are people out. Because of this, the population is incredibly fit. All ages except the old Babushka's who deserve to have a little extra around the middles! lol

So we waited in our new apartment Sunday night, for the next day to come. On Monday we are to go get approval to visit Vala at the orphanage and have contact. We did not sleep well, but better than we had since leaving home.

The government buildings are incredible. It's just so hard to explain, but image a post-Soviet building. Almost all buildings are made of poured concrete. The walls are uneven in width, but seem to be around 18" thick. When a new door or window is needed, they have to get through it somehow, haul out all that concrete and rebar, and patch it best they can. We understand that construction that was underway while Mark & Sally were here, looks the same a year later when we showed up Monday morning. The bags of concrete are still sitting in the hallway along with other construction material.

Another thing that is so obvious is how people live in the dark here, literally. We walked through several dark hallways to get to this official office - a governmental building. It's amazing how they are used to it. John and I waited in a dark room/hallway for our turn (about 45 minutes).

But the permission we obtained and we headed to the orphanage. With the inspector in tow, we walked in the orphanage, down a hallway, hook a corner, past several women, turned into an office and................. did I mention most Ukrainians walk very fast? Anyone who's walked with me knows I can walk quite fast, but keeping up with them, even a woman in 3" spiked heels, is a chore! We were following in single file line, trying not to get left behind, when suddenly we were in the Director's office and standing 3 feet away from Vala!!!

I was dumbstruck! I didn't know she would be in on the meeting - I was thinking she would be called in later. I stood there, with John behind me, I think staring just like me. Finally (and thankfully!) Sergiy said, "Well hug her!"

She was all smiles and you could see the tension in her face as she looked up at me. She had no idea what he had just said in English, but you could see the pleading in her eyes saying, "Please accept me as okay". I reached over and gave her a side hug, as my left hand was full of stuff we brought in for the meeting. She was stiff and did not hug back. She looked up at me with the same fixed smile on her face, no teeth showing.

It melted and broke my heart! As we found out later, she found out we were coming on Friday. She could barely contain herself all weekend. When the Director showed up to her office on Monday morning at 7:00am, Vala was waiting at her door. She had not slept, did not eat breakfast and had not left the office until we arrived at that very moment! She did not want to wait one single second longer than she had to to see us. And she knew the first place we would have to go was the Director's office.

Wed. Oct. 21st

Don bass Arena - where we watched the football game. They made it look like a giant diamond when it's lit up. (and as some say, a large UFO during the day). We were fortunate enough that Sergiy's in-law was able to get John & I tickets on such short notice. We were honored they invited us to join them for this time of relaxation. It was fun.
















Today is Wednesday. We have officially been in Ukraine for over a week. We are finally holding food in after several days of having upset systems. We also slept last night with only waking up once and are feeling more refreshed than we have in days. Thank you all for your prayers. We know this is the reason why we are doing better - we contibute it to God and the prayer of the saints!

Jenn